until Texas vs Kansas

Friday, October 7

 

ATL dream team

SI.com asked ATL to compile a dream team of college football and we did. You can read our picks on SI's A-List here and see what other college football bloggers had to say. Our list, as written by Travis:

QB: Vince Young, Texas. He’s a taller Michael Vick. He’s turned the once-timid Longhorns into a cocky bunch that finally knows how good they are. And will be responsible for finally (FINALLY!) delivering a conference championship to Mack Brown’s deserving finger.

WR: Derrick Williams, Penn State. Williams will help Joe Paterno get his one last winning season so he can finally retire and the college football world can move on from this drawn out saga. For that earthshaking development alone, he’s on the team.

WR: Tyrone Prothro, Alabama. He deserves some love for just surviving that nasty injury. Plus, when healthy, he can do it all.

RB: Reggie Bush, USC. The dude is sick. Easily the most dangerous player in college football. I’d pick him before Leinart if I was an NFL GM.

TE: Leonard Pope, Georgia. He’s 6-7, so I guess he’s good. We will see a 7-footer within 10 years; bank on it. Can you imagine a guy like Amare Stoudemire running a corner route? In a couple of years, you will.

Offensive line: Texas. Everything’s bigger down here, including our linemen.

Defensive line: Nebraska. A look at the stats shows the Huskers are leading the nation in sacks. Did I miss the arrival of another Peter brother? Quick, hide the tap.

Linebackers: Ohio State. They've got three Steve Lattimers. Don’t park your car outside the Ohio State locker room unless you want to come out to find broken windows where these three monsters put their heads.

Defensive backs: Miami. I am sure they’ve got someone names Moss or Rolle back there with gold teeth running 4.1 40s. They always do.

Offensive coordinator: Greg Davis, Texas. The man is beloved by Texas fans everywhere. Since Mike Leach will aim to score 100 every game, Greg Davis will serve as the voice of reason and call the tunnel screen 17 times every game to keep the score respectable

Defensive coordinator: Jerry Glanville, Hawaii. Seriously? He’s the DC and not the OC? Awesome! Wonder if he’s still leaving tickets for Elvis.

Head coach: Mike Leach, Texas Tech. Leach runs up the score, goes for it on fourth down all the time, and generally treats his games they’re sponsored by EA Sports. Plus, he’s the best quote ever.
From
http://www.redraiders.com/stories/100405/foo_100405008.shtml:
Lest Nebraska fans be offended, Leach said he's looking forward to Saturday's trip to Lincoln, Neb. Leach talked up Memorial Stadium, for how loud it is and for its history, among other things.

"They have a lot of tradition there," Leach said. "It's exciting to go there. You know, Tommy Lee went there. I don't really have too much of his stuff, but he's a rock 'n' roll icon. So the chance to go play at the school where Tommy Lee was in the band for a very brief period of time's exciting."

Fans: Texas A&M, because every Saturday at College Station is Halloween. The cheerleaders dress up like milkmen and the band dresses up like the Third Reich. When the Aggies don’t provide enough laughs by going to overtime against Baylor every year, you can look at the idiots swaying back and forth and be thankful you don’t live there.

Moustache: Anyone but Wanny. He sucks in every way possible.

Comments:
Absolutely hilarious! I love how it starts of serious and trails off into a blur of bullshit!
 
I'm going to have to throw in a few votes for some other Pac-10 players:

TE Marcedes Lewis (UCLA) - This guy is also 6'7" and will challenge Pope for the John Mackey Award. Because UCLA has so little of a receiving threat, this guy is getting doubled and tripled all the time, but on a good team would dominate.

WR Mike Hass (Oregon St) - In 5 games, he has 831 yds receiving and 4 TDS, averaging 17.7 yds/rec. All this despite having a crappy QB and no other good receivers to take the DBs off of him.
 
I thought you were kidding about Jerry Glanville being the DC at Hawaii, but I went the the Rainbows' website and sure enough, Glanville is a Rainbow.

http://uhathletics.hawaii.edu/coach_bio.html?pid=3&coachid=147

Didn't Cartman say he hates Rainbows because they shoot out of your ass?
 
It's always better to trail off into a blur of bullshit than to blur off into a trail of bullshit. You never want to leave a trail. Thanks, though.

Pac 10 man, I'll keep an eye our for your boys. Anything I can to do eliminate the biases the media has against the West Coast. (Except Cal. Those guys are just whiners.)
 
That's pretty cool that you got to do that! The only thing I would do different is take the USC offensive line and TE Lewis from UCLA.
 
Moustache: No question it's the Fresno State coach...
 
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